But Officer It Was Pink

“If winning was easy, losers would do it” I had to laugh at this statement when I heard it again today, it was used on a commercial for Nascar touting how hard it is to win, and the things this particular driver does to keep his edge.

What is your definition of winning? When it comes to driving, are you one of those people who have to be the first one off the line when the light turns green, and do you have to pass the car ahead of you just because they are driving the speed limit, you know that it is an unwritten law that you are supposed to drive at least five miles over the speed limit or else be labeled a slow driver.

Since I mentioned traffic lights, what is your definition of the colors, does yellow actually mean caution, slow down, prepare to stop, and or just go ahead and stop, or does it mean “Floor It!” try and get through the intersection before the light turns red.

What exactly is a Pink Light? You know Pink, not exactly red it’s that color right between the yellow and red light, it flashes so fast most people don’t ever see it, so next time you get stopped for running a red light, just try and explain to the officer that you were not in the wrong because the light was actually pink.

If he argues with you, just tell him that it flashed pink so fast that he couldn’t see it, and furthermore the City should adjust their signals, if he buys this story and you get off with a warning, then count your lucky stars, and if you get an extra ticket for jerking his chain, don’t blame me, because this is not advice, this is just my observations on traffic signals, and the mostly unseen extra color.

Now back to passing cars, how slow does that car ahead have to be going for you to pass, does the speed limit constitute driving too slow, say the speed limit is 65mph and the car ahead of you is driving 64mph, how fast do you have to drive to actually pass this car?

But officer, I wasn’t speeding, I was just trying to get around that slow car, never mind that you were going 80 in a 65 and that car you were passing sped up just a bit as you pulled out, you know just to show you, I know you have either had this happen, known someone it has happened to, or have done it yourself.

And what do you do when you are driving down the road minding your own business, doing absolutely nothing wrong, when you see flashing lights on top of a police car on the other side of the road, this police officer is standing on the side of the road either writing a ticket, or hearing a tale of the infamous pink light syndrome that effects most cities.

The first thing you do is hit your brakes, then you may go so far as to turn down the radio, and stare into the rear view mirror so hard that it begins to fog over from your heavy breathing, you know this officer has to be looking directly at you, and will be coming after you as soon as he can get back to his car, you may not even be speeding but all the voices in your car come together in unison to yell out “Cop”

When we were returning from the trip to the zoo with the kids, we were following a van on the highway; this van was actually going the speed limit so Cindy was not too anxious to go around it, a car behind us began flashing his bright lights every so often, we were in a long line of traffic so passing was not going to happen easily, and pulling over for him would only leave us further behind on our schedule, so Cindy backed away from the van to give him room to pass just in case he wanted to try.

This guy was alternating between running with his bright lights on, his lights off, flashing his lights, then he pulled out to pass, his convertible sports car looked pretty impressive going around us so fast, not only did he pass us, he also passed the van and another car in front of the van, narrowly missing an oncoming car only to fall in behind the next group of cars to which he began the light flashing routine again, looks like he wanted to be the first one to town, the winner so to say.

The highway speed limit drops to 55 then down to 45 as you get into town, right at the forty five speed limit sign we see flashing lights, to which the whole back seat yells in unison “Cop”

Sitting there in front of the State Troopers car was that impressive looking convertible sports car, I can hear it now “But officer, I wasn’t really speeding I was passing that long line of cars” wonder how he explained the flashing headlights.

I just imagine that little ticket most likely cost him more than what we spent all day at the zoo, and another thing his driving style assured him of being the winner to town, and our driving the speed limit was going to get us there way after him, I think I know who won that little race.